Ahh, election season once again. Time to get controversial.
So um, here's the thing. I hate Trump. He embarrasses me every day. He makes us look like backwards idiots. And frankly the fact that he got elected means that we probably are all backwards idiots. Um, he's ruining people's lives, he's making horrible racist decisions which are probably going to have long-lasting repercussions long after he's out of office. Overall I would be a much happier person if we found a way to deport him from every position of power that he has ever had.
But I'm not voting for abortionists, and claiming that abortion protects women is a very shallow way to look at it, to say the least. Republicans may have chosen literally the least likable candidate they could find, all for the lulz, but the Democrats are wicked. And as it turns out, that's not even the worst part.
Gov. Walz is bad at Crazy Taxi.
I'm a Minnesotan through and through. I may live in Nebraska, but I spent the first 20 years of my life in Minnesota. I love the Minnesota Vikings. I love lefse. I love going to the lake. I love saying "Doncha kno." However, I am not a fan of Gov. Walz.
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| Stupid flag council should have picked this one from DeviantArt Tieger131 |
I respect him for being one of the few politicians who acknowledges that teachers exist, and thinks they are valuable to society. I want him out for his abortion policies. (Do you think I'm a single-issue voter yet?) But this is the final straw.
He probably did own a Sega Dreamcast back in the day, 25 years ago. He probably did play Crazy Taxi. But his skills do not show it. He overshoots the first stop by a long way, and I don't think he knows about the brake. I doubt he has any memory of the Crazy Box, if he played through it. Because he could have done a crazy stop to stop in a second. It's okay. The Crazy Taxi passengers don't believe in whiplash. In fact, they pay you better.
Walz drives really slow. I think he might not be pressing the analog trigger down far enough? I'm not sure what port he is playing, so I don't know what controller he's on. (I know it's not the Dreamcast port, because the soundtrack is different. Probably Xbox 360 or Steam.) If he had played Crazy Box mode, he might have learned about the crazy boost. It would have really helped him out.
His weaving skills are weak. The name of the game when it comes to driving in oncoming traffic is to make very slight adjustments on the analog stick so you can get through with as little movement as possible. Massive adjustments in velocity just make you a bigger target. But he doesn't make slight adjustments. I'm starting to wonder if he's playing on keyboard and mouse.
And finally, he loses a passenger really early into the game. Losing a passenger is not super uncommon, because the downtown area, with the multitude of intersections and similar-looking buildings, can screw you over. But this is only 2 minutes or so past the start of the game. It's because of the reasons above. He doesn't know how to brake, or at least not effectively. He drives slow for some reason. His weaving skills are unrefined at best. He's not good at the game.
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| What controller is he holding? |
It's funny. AOC said something along the lines of, "Nobody watching can say you haven't played a Dreamcast." I think Gov. Walz probably did play Crazy Taxi on Dreamcast, but I would not argue if you don't believe him. His skills are weak. You might as well pretend that it's your first time if you're gonna be that bad on stream.
Is this the type of man we want in our federal government? I say nay. If you vote for Harris-Walz, I won't automatically be upset with you. I don't think that way. But if you vote for them because of Walz' Crazy Taxi skills, you're off your rocker.
I miss Jesse Ventura. We should re-elect him as governor. What a time that would be.
